There is a difference between sadness and depression.
You see, sadness is a moment, a moment filled with sad and depressing thoughts. But, during that moment you feel.
Depression is something else, depression can be so much longer than ”a moment”, and the worst thing is probably that you don’t feel a damn thing. It’s a dangerous place to be, to be in a place where it’s hard to care anymore. It’s hard to get out that deep, deep place.
”Depressive people tend to act more calmly than others under heavy pressure, because they already expect bad things to happen.” No shit, sherlock.
Becoming an adult, having been pushed and pulled – and seeing things around me even more clear has pulled me into a, what some call, midlifecrisis. Stupid study choices, money, love and the reality of life. Yes, I sometimes feel like I’m 30-ish, because I can see that
- it’s hard to make important choices that will affect my future,
- studying costs a shit load of money, and it’s even harder without the right people.
- it’s hard to find true love. Where are all the gentlemen?! My standards are not high, there are just not a lot of proper guys out there anymore.
And despite all of this, all I want is happiness and a lil’ bit of love.
Why the hell do I have to think about this at this age?